Feeling super emotional and not in a good place. Doesn’t help that it’s nearly 3a and I haven’t slept a wink yet. 

Started as a sleepless night, has turned into stomach troubles and obsessing. 

Obsessing over every little thing. 

I’ve gorged on plastic surgery before and after’s for hours now. Convinced I’m going to need far more plastic surgery to look halfway decent than I’ll ever be able to afford. 

Feeling wholly inadequate at the moment. 

My goal has always been to better myself and beat myself and go further than I thought I was capable of. I’m working so hard, meeting and exceeding goals, but still not feeling satisfied. 

I’ve always been afraid of “contentment” because I never want to settle. I feel like never being content is what pushes me to do more. But, I guess sometimes there’s a downside to never being satisfied or content in life. 

Im sure this will pass, but in the moment it’s feeling rather heavy on my soul.