1/3 of the way there! 

I had a Dr appt yesterday to follow up post-surgery and they had my weight lower than what I weighed just on Monday. I didn’t want to count the loss, until I weighed on my own scale, to stay consistent. 

Instead of waiting until Friday, I went ahead and weighed myself this morning– not only did I finally hit the 5-0 lbs down mark, I surpassed it! 

Weight today is 264, for a total loss of 52 lbs since February. I’m looking to lose a total of approximately 150 lbs, so I’m officially 1/3 of the way there! That’s major progress! 

Re-energized to try and still lose 18 more lbs by the wedding, for 70lbs down. I have 51 days, so I think it’s feasible. I’ve just really got to stay focused and kill it! 

I’m pretty excited I hit my first big goal finally. Now to just keep the momentum rolling! 

  

Having it all

I’ve been vehemently told that “you can’t have everything you want in life”… I’ve decided to use that as motivation, to get exactly what I want: everything.

I’ve never believed in settling- for anything. I never settled in a relationship, which led to many lonely and frustrating and quite tiring years. I’ve never stopped working towards what I want at work- it still feels so far away, but my loving fiancé reminded me today that I’m close- and I am. I’m not saying it’s going to happen in the timeframe I want it to, but, I do think it’s going to happen. So why would I settle for less than living a healthy life?

My weight has always been my Achilles heel. The one thing i could never control- though I’ve certainly tried. Control. What a problem that has been for me. It’s lead me down some dark roads.

But now I’m passed those times, and I’m deserving of good health. I’m not looking to be a size zero, I just want to be a healthy weight. Why would I ever give up on working towards this goal?

If I truly believe that you can have it all in life, that includes being healthy and happy. I’m happier now than I’ve ever been in my whole life. I feel so blessed and there are good things to come.

I’m not giving up on this battle. I’m not 100% if I’m going to have the surgery or not, but I’m still looking in to the possibility. I have to do what’s right for me, regardless of what others may think.

I wanted to be able to do it on my own, but since when is asking for help when you need it a bad thing? Some people will judge. But, as long as I am comfortable with my decision, that’s all that matters.

I’m going to get every single thing I want out of life- or at least die trying.

What did you do right today?

victories

I am personally trying to focus more on the positive and let go of the negative. I had a comment about being hard on myself, which was nothing I hadn’t heard before. But. maybe it was the last time I needed to hear it. I’m not saying I’m suddenly perfect or anything, but I am consciously trying to not be so hard on myself. Part of that is celebrating tiny victories! So I want to know what you did RIGHT today? 

What I did right was staying on my calorie goal and remaining under for the day. See, instantly I thought of something I should have done differently today, but NOPE, I’m shutting those thoughts down! Focus on the positive!!!! 

So I am going to mark this day down as a “win” in my book! This week is looking pretty good to me! 

I can only take it one day at a time. When you have such a massive amount of weight to lose, it’s easy to get overwhelmed or discouraged by slow progress. But, slow progress is better than NO progress! Which, I’ve dealt with off and on the last few weeks. I’ve been a bit of a yo-yo on that front. Gaining, re-losing, re-gaining, etc.

But, today I did good. And as a matter of fact, yesterday I did well, too. So that is 2 good days this week! I may only be down a lb or two this week, but at least it will be heading in the right direction. I’m not going to lose 9lbs in a week, like I did that first week, probably ever again. That was a drastic change and a fluke, I think. But, the way I’m going to do this is by losing 1-2 lbs a week, every week, for the next 10 months. 

So- I’m waiting to hear about your tiny victories today! 

Plugging Along

Had a pretty kick ass day today. This is Day 5 that I’ve been back on track, so I definitely expect to lose again this week. 

Got some amazing news this morning and something I have been super stressed about is now pretty much resolved. It’s a ginormous weight off my shoulders, that’s for sure. It’s amazing how much stress can weigh us down. 

Taught me a lesson: Just have faith. Are you noticing a recurring theme yet? 

I had realized I needed to relinquish control to God, in my situation, and then miraculously today the problem was solved! So, I’m really try to let go of the other stress and anxiety I have and just trust that everything really will work out. i think my realization Friday that the only thing I could control was my attitude is helping with this as well I’m in such a better place mentally and emotionally than I was. 

Now I just have to stay strong and keep working on the physical. I’ve done really well today. It feels so amazing to get up and get my workout taken care of first thing in the morning, especially on busy/long days like today. 

My eating has been really on track today, too. I feel so proud of myself, instead of mad and frustrated and disappointed, etc. 

I really think I turned a corner in a big way- not just as far as my diet goes, but in life. I’ve got a whole new outlook and attitude. One that’s much healthier for me. Which is what this is all about- getting healthy. Physically, mentally ,emotionally. 

So, I’m just going to keep on plugging away and doing what I’m doing.

 

owl

11lbs down… 89 to go

20140703-100317-36197423.jpg

I weighed myself a day early- AGAIN! Talk about impatience! BUT- even with clothes on, the scale showed me down 2lbs since last week. Yay!!!!

So happy the scale is moving. “Slow progress is better than no progress”. I am intentionally trying to take a slow and steady approach to this so that it is a sustainable change. I’m not doing anything drastic or looking for a quick fix. This is a permanent lifestyle change.

Pretty proud of myself this morning! The past week I wasn’t perfect, but I made enough good decisions and I’m seeing results.

Next week is week 4, which means new progress pics get taken! From past experience, I don’t expect to really be able to see any noticeable change between the two sets of pics.

But I’m doing it monthly for accountability reasons, as well as to track my progression. I’m putting it all out there so it would be far too painful to fail publicly. I’m attacking this and I’m going to keep going!

I’ll keep with the weekly weigh-ins no matter what and monthly progress pics. That should help keep me on track.

Just wanted to share my week 3 weigh day results. So that’s 11 lbs down since i started 3 weeks ago and 89 lbs to go to my wedding date! I see a beautiful bride in my future! 👰

Miami, Monday and malady

Well I’m happy to report I survived driving back and forth to Miami for a ball game without completely trashing my eating regime. (Notice I do not use the word “diet“. This is not temporary, this is a new lifestyle for me. In any event, we had a great time at the game and while I partook of some of the oodles of food and a little wine that surrounded us in the suite, I managed to avoid soda and drank water. A lot of water.

I also made home-made egg, sausage, cheese and bread casserole for the fiancé this weekend. No idea how many calories, but I’m trying to figure out how to account for this situation in the future.

I’m slightly stressed that I ate more of that than I should have and that the calories are outrageous. But I’m trying to stay calm and move forward. I’m definitely not using this as an excuse to binge, like I would have in the past. I’m getting right back on the wagon and tracking cals.

I am a little disappointed in myself but I’m trying not to let it overtake me. I can’t focus on that, I have to stay focused on my goal, which I’ll meet. I didn’t get my walk in this weekend either, but I did almost hit my step goal yesterday, nonetheless.

Will get back to walking tonight, despite being exhausted and battling a stomach issue. Because I’m not feeling the best, I haven’t eaten lunch, but I’m really not hungry or feeling up to it, though I am making sure I keep drinking lots of water.

All in all, for my first weekend on my new healthful journey, I think I did ok. Not perfect, but weekends have always been such a huge struggle for me, especially when there are special events thrown in there. But I didn’t completely lose it or go off track and today I’m back being uber accountable.

So I’m going to choose to see this as a success and just do even better this coming weekend. We are having family dinner Sunday (lasagna) but I’m going to figure out cals in advance and work it in. It’s all about planning for me. Still determined to do this…

20140623-135938-50378636.jpg